This morning I was on the phone with my sister in law and we got into the topic of doctors appointments. Both our youngest kids have their appointments coming up and we’re dreading it! Why? Well it seems like every time I go to a “milestone” appointment, I get told I’m doing something wrong or my child isn’t on track like the other 99 percent of the baby population.
I have three kids. I learned not to take everything the Pedatrician says to heart. I learned to remember that I’m their mom. Not her. Me. I know what is best for my children because I’m with them every single day, all day long. I know that my youngest needs to be held when he wakes up from his nap, because if I put his feet on the ground too early he turns into the Incredible Hulk and starts smashing his head into the floor.
He just needs a little more snuggles and love before he can venture off to the playroom and that is okay! I am not going to hinder his chances of being in the popular crowd in 7th grade because I held him for 10 extra minutes each day.
There are so many “rules” now when it comes to parenting. Don’t spank your kids, don’t give them juice, ask them if you can change their diaper, (which is absolutely INSANE, I’m not asking my 18 month old permission to change him. He will lay there while I change him so his butt doesn’t smell like a horse stable for a second longer.) Don’t hold them too much, they need tummy time for 10 minutes every two hours.. like, damn. How did we survive 30 years ago? We all should be dead because I’m sure non of yall’s mom followed those rules!
Anyways, at my son’s last appointment I was made to feel like I did something wrong. I was made out to be this terrible mother who could of saved my son the trauma from the 20 mosquito bites on each one of his legs. I walk into the room with the doctor who immediately started checking his legs. She says, “how did he get bit so many times?” Well. Obviously I don’t know. I didn’t ask the mosquitos why they liked my child’s legs more than Susan’s. I didn’t follow him around and count how many mosquitos landed on his skin. But of course, I answered politely with a “We were outside and the kids were running around in the backyard, the mosquitos must of been bad that night.” She says, “why wasn’t he wearing pants???” I’m a little taken back by this one honestly, because we both obviously live in the same state, which is Texas, so how she’s asking me this question really just blows my mind. In my head I’m thinking, uhh I don’t know, BECAUSE ITS 105 DEGREES OUTSIDE!!” But again, I politely said..” because it was very hot outside and I didn’t want to overheat him.” She says well, kids his age don’t need to be out after dark anyways.
SAYS WHO?! It just makes me shake my head how judgmental doctors can be when you know damn well they are giving their kids apple juice when they get home too!
If my youngest wants 4 cups of milk in one day Instead of the recommended 2 cups, then I’m going to probably give it to him.
If he wants to be held a little more one day, I’m going to give him all the snuggles he wants. If he wants to lay in bed with me because he’s crabby one morning, I will let him sleep with me and no I won’t carry him back to his crib when he falls asleep.
Next time you have an appointment with the Pedatrician and they tell you your baby is only in the 10 percentile for height, but he should be in the 30th percentile, just remember to breathe. Remember that you’re not doing anything wrong. My sons were always on the low end of the charts, they were just little. My now eight year old is still just little. He’s super active, very healthy, but just small. There is nothing wrong with that. Sometimes kids just grow differently, some are big, some are petite, some grow in 1st grade, some grow more in 3rd grade. Just remember that. I’m not saying ignore your doctors concerns, I’m just saying that usually it’s nothing you’re doing wrong, it’s just how their bodies are growing.
At the end of the day, you have to remember that you don’t have to follow every single “new study.” You need to follow your heart. You need to follow what you feel is right for your child. You’re the mama.. and you’re a damn good one. Mosquito bitten legs and all.